It's almost over!

Impressive amounts of money were spent printing this masterpiece of restrained graphic brilliance.

So, while the poster is complete and exhibited, and all my drawings/models are lovingly placed on a platform in the exhibition room, I still don't feel that overwhelming sense of relief and completion that I expected at this point. I guess that is because I am not totally satisfied with the drawings I chose and the way I put them together. 

I thought I was, but after seeing the poster up at full scale I realized that my site plan was overwhelmingly huge and not totally crisp; some of the lineweights were wrong; the terrace side of my section wasn't matched up to the line drawing; some people got blurry in the export to PDF; there were purple splotches on the lakes; my text for the analysis was too small to read; I made an unforgivable text mistake; and I didn't have any 'real' drawings. Oh, and also, no one can tell what the hell my project is because I blended it in to the context too skillfully. Damn you, photoshop.

I really haven't been able to fully relax although I do feel much better having slept a full night and cleaned up the apartment.

Today I'm going to scan some of my drawings that I chose not to submit for assessment--sketch paper process drawings really--but that will add to my reasoning in my presentation. I know that my analysis, theory, and process are really good. It's just the final result I feel nervous about. At all the midterms I got good reviews and good feedback, but it is always easier to present something in progress because nothing is totaly nailed down and if you sense doubt about something, you can change it later. In the final, you have to be ready to defend every move you made and explain why it's the best one. I don't feel that all my choices were made intelligently. Sometimes I feel that my 2am brain took over and said 'just get it done' so there are discrepancies in what I present vs. what I intended.

Anyways. The best strategy now is to focus on the strongest parts of my project, and try to leave the rest behind. Oh, oh, oh. If only...

Thesis is stressful. I know I won't fail but all I can picture at the final review is disappointment and hard criticisms.

*sigh*