toss turn stupid thinking worrying.

So, a few months ago when our school started distributing rooms and contact info for renting rooms, Jed and I asked for something suitable for a couple. The school sent us the email of a place they had used for students in the past. So of course we happily thought 'this is school-sponsored and therefore safe.'

We contacted the people and got a wonderful email back, everyone introduced themselves, and we were all feeling very good. The place is a 2-bedroom house, part of which is used for the owners' business. The house, as we understand, consists of 2 bedrooms and a living room on the upper floor, and a kitchen and bathroom on the main floor. The house is in the southern part of Orestad, a suburb of Copenhagen. 

All things moving along swimmingly, we ask for photos of the place. The owners tell us it's been unoccupied for the better part of the year and has been used for storage for their company. They told us we would have photos by the middle of July.  

The middle of July came and went, and both Jed and I emailed, saying that we don't mind if the house is in a state of disarray... we just want to know a general idea of what it looks like, so that we can make a final decision. The owners told us they understand that we will not pay our damage deposit/first month's rent until we see photographs. 

They emailed us a few photos of Copenhagen and the backyard of the house, but not the inside. It's now August 5 and still. NO. photos. 

I am hoping praying trying to convince myself that the reason they haven't sent photos is because they have been very busy this summer and are running behind on getting things set up. I look back at the emails I've gotten from them, and they sound so genuine and kind, I don't want to think anything bad could happen.

But the date of departure is getting nearer and nearer, and I don't think they understand how stressful and nerve-racking it is to have literally NO idea what our potential living space looks like. It could be a dump! It could be completely unacceptable! And now that it's the first week in August, it's getting to be too late to find something else, just in case. 

Now I feel like we've been the biggest fools ever for not having more than one option lined up... What if this IS a scam? What if the owners are keeping us on the line until we arrive with nowhere else to go, then force us to pay them astronomical amounts of money? What if the place is a crack house? 

I am trying to tell myself that everything will be fine, and that the people are not scam-artists, and that it was recommended by the school after all, etc. But gol-darnit, I am so stressed I have been trying to sleep for the last hour and a half, and it's not working. 

I am starting to feel queasy. The last time I had accommodations lined up on the other side of the world, my aunt got Alzheimer's and on the day of my departure, forgot who I was and had no idea she was supposed to be providing a place for me to live. So, yeah, forgive me if I'm being slightly paranoid, but, you know. Shit happens.

Ug, Grar, Ak, Nnng.  And flailing. Lots of flailing.